August 2005

I'm in a rocky relationship with my fiancee of one year, Our wedding is approaching shortly and last night we had a hellacious fight.

In the past we have both been physically and verbally abusive towards each other but we have made some good progress. When she gets upset now she will hit me, slap me, kick me, and I feel like a sissy if I was to call the police. Should I leave?

Dear Dr. T:

I am a single 52 year old man who had a 10 year love affair with a married co-worker. Six years went by before I realized she was not going to leave, but by then I was too in love to act on it. During the last two years of our affair she became cold & unloving, and I had to leave to survive.

I am torn between my mother and my future husband. I am engaged but he is from another state. (About a 17 hour drive). He moved down here for about a year or so, but hated it and missed his family, so he went back home. He wanted me to go with him but I couldn't at the time.

When I told my mother I was thinking about moving up there with him, at first she was supportive saying positive things about moving, but later she told me that she was only being positive because if she tried to discourage me I would just get mad and move.