Former Prostitute

You say that your past life as a prostitute is ruining your sexualperformance with your wife. What you don't say is why you think this ishappening. In order to resolve the problem, we first need to understandwhy it is occuring. Let's take a moment to figure out how your past maybe getting you down.

I'll throw out some possibilities. You see if anyof these theories fit. My first thought was that you may be feelingguilty over your sexual past. Such feelings cause a release ofchemicals in your body that are sufficient to interfere with yoursexual arousal and performance.

I also wonder if having been aprostitute has conditioned you to be aroused by certain forms ofstimuli (group sex or kinky sexual practices) that you aren'texperiencing with your wife. As a result, you may not be feelingadequately turned on by the ordinary meat and potatoes marital sex withyour wife. If you aren't feeling adequately aroused, then you wouldnaturally have trouble getting or maintaining and erection.

I alsowonder if you are sexually burned out. Think about a professional truckdriver who spends long hours on the road; the last thing he wants onhis day off is to get into a truck! If sex has become old hat to you,then that might explain why you aren't getting turned on with yourwife.

In addition to exploring the above possibilities, I think youalso need to understand why you chose to be a prostitute in the firstplace. I have the persuasion that your choice of career may offer cluesas to why you are having the problem with your wife that you nowexperience. Ask yourself the question'why did I become a prostitute'and see what ideas come up (pardon the pun). I would have to wonder ifyou chose that career because you didn't want to become attached to oneperson. In other words, by sleeping with many strangers, yourunconscious mind may have arranged your life so that you could avoidattachments.

My point is that you may, without being aware of it, beterrified to become too intimate with another person. I know that youleft prostitution and married, but keep in mind that your unconsciousmind may not be comfortable with this recent turn of events. If I amright and you are afraid to become too close, then your unconsciousmind might actually be arranging to drive a wedge between you and yourwife by not allowing you to perform. You said yourself that yourdeepest fear is that you are going to drive her away. Perhaps that 'sexactly what your unconscious mind wants!

I have given you a lot ofavenues to explore. Once you figure out the issue that is causing yourperformance problem, then you can take steps to address the problem andresolve it. This may require the help of a therapist.