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He's Having Sexual Dreams About His Ex

Submitted by Anonymous on Tue, 01/01/2002 - 7:00pm
in
January 1, 2002

Question

I am engaged to be married. I have been with my fiance for 3 years. Twice while sleeping my fiance has said his ex-wife's name while dreaming. By the other things he was saying it was obvious that this was a sex dream.

I felt very hurt by this and concerned that perhaps he has feelings for her still. He has reassured me that he doesnt and says he feels really bad about it but has no recollection of the dreams.

Is this somehting I should be concerned about? They have been divorced 5 years. He dated a few people in between meeting me and his divorce. Thank you 


Answer
I understand that you are feeling threatened. You know, just because a person is married (or soon to be married) doesn't mean that he/she isn't going to feel sexual attraction for others (meaning not their life partners). He may, in fact, still feel sexually attracted to his ex. But, obviously they were not compatible in other areas, and he divorced her. I wouldn't be so concerned. His ex. won't be the first or the last woman he feels sexually attracted to. He left his ex., and has chosen to be with you, so if you are happy with the relationship and feel that he is happy with you, just feel glad that he has chosen you.

- Doctor Love

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