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How to Make Him Love Me Again?

Submitted by Anonymous on Mon, 02/26/2007 - 8:00pm
February 26, 2007

Question

First my english isn't that good, so sorry

Here's my story. I loved a guy in my faculty so much we were in deep love. . . I believed so. . it was so true. . . I never loved or thought I could love someone as I loved him.

We dated for a year. . . but for the last 2 months we began to fight a lot and it ways always over small things.

But it didn't change me or my love. But for him, he changed a lot and became so strange not like before. . . (well as you see that was his excuse for why he stopped feeling anything towards me.

Finally we left each other and he told me to forget him but really I've tried but I can't. I have a big hope that he will come back to me because I believed in our love. . . I believe that I can do something that could refresh his love in his heart (He hasn't forgotten me totally he told me that I'm still his only love and that he'll never love anyone the way he loved me. . . but his problem is that he doesn't feel towards me as before. . .

he told me that his love for me now could be rated to 40%. . . . and one thing . . . We're both suffering . . . for me I'm suffering because I can't carry on or live normally and for losing the man I loved, . . . etc. I just can't accept my fate. . . . . . but for him he's suffering because he he's quite lonely now

plzzzzzzzz give some advice or steps to take. . . to make him love me again. . . should I leave him for a while and give him a space to recognize how is life without me . . . or talk him over and over. I really don't know

zz help thnx


Answer

It's obvious that the two of you are very attached to each other.

I would tell your ex that you aren't surprised that his feelings are only at 40%. Tell him that you spoke with me and that I told you to tell him that unresolved anger erodes feelings of love. The two of you didn't know how to resolve your issues. Tell him that when the anger between you is resolved that his feelings of love will return.

I've seen many couples who were sure their love was dead as a result of years of fighting suddenly rediscover the lost they thought was lost.

I recommend that you both read my book, Till Death Do Us Part (Unless I Kill You First). The book will help you both understand why you were in conflict in the first place. You will also find out that you both suffer from unhealed childhood wounds and it was these wounds that caused you to fight. The book will guide you to identify the exact nature of each of your wounds and then it will show you how to use your relationship to heal.

You both have nothing to lose and everything to gain by helping each other to heal. Tell him that when the wounds are healed, his anger and resentment will fade and his feelings of love will blossom once again. Tell him that this healing process is a win/win plan for both of you.

Let me know what happens.

- Doctor Love

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