Man Who Loses His Erection Whenever His Lover Performs Oral Sex on Him

I know that you want to believe that the problem isn't psychological, but I am afraid it is. Because your erectile difficulties are situational, meaning that the problem occurs during a specific instance, we can be sure that the problem is emotional.

If the erectile problem were physically caused, then you would have trouble getting erections across the board, and you wouldn't awaken with erections and you wouldn't have erections during masturbation. In other words, the plumbing works just fine.

Realize also that the emotional conflict that is causing your body to shut-down when she goes down on you is completely out of your conscious awareness. It is buried in your unconscious mind. If you are open to finding out what unconscious conflict could be causing your body to go on strike when she tries to fellate (when someone performs oral sex on a man) you, then read on.

If this is too frightening to face, then stop reading here. To analyze your unconscious, ask yourself the following question: 'What is frightening to me about being fellated?' Many men are unconsciously afraid of being fellated because of what the act symbolizes. The symbolism relates to being afraid of being eaten alive, swallowed up, taken over or devoured by a woman.

This fear usually stems from a childhood relationship with a mother who was invasive or controlling. The boy who was raised by this type of mother grows into a man who is afraid of being taken over by women. This fear often manifests itself in being afraid of giving the penis (which symbolize a man's very identity) over to a woman.

I have given you a lot to think about. You may find it necessary to talk to a therapist who can help you work-through the feelings that you uncover.

As you become stronger in your sense of self, and you feel sure that you can protect your identity by setting limits in all areas of the relationship, your body shouldn't need to armor itself in this way.