She Dyed Her Hair to Match Yours

Dear Dr. Turndorf.

I am 30 years old shy and reserved male, and I really like one girl, but I am not sure where I stand with her.

She is very beautiful and nice I think, or at least I thought so. Last summer I noticed she was looking at me quite often in a club we go to. About 2 months ago, I decided to make a little move, maybe because I had a few drinks. When I was entering the club, she was at the doorway, probably leaving, so I greeted her with a handshake and looked deeply in her eyes for a few seconds. She looked back right back at me. Then I smiled a little and went inside and looked around. When I did, she was standing at the bar looking at me. I went to her to greet her, then she looked down, smiled and became a little shy I think.

Then something happened, and old friend from college came right between us and greeted me. Then it struck me. . . he must like her too (I know that know), and he was trying to stop me or something. When I was finished talking with him, she was gone.

Two weeks later, back at the club, she was there again, and I gave her little pat on her shoulder as she walked by, she smiled a little, but didnt look at me. Later that night she left with someone, not sure whether it was a girl or guy. Then I thought that she didn't really like me, and felt a little sad. Then, two weeks later, something strange happened. I had recently entered the club, and was looking around, when someone came right at me. It was her!?!. She had dyed her hair dark, similar to mine, (she is a blonde), she looked right into my eyes, and shook my hand. I greeted her, smiled a little shook her hand, and then I walked past her.

I think I made a big mistake there. But I was so surprised, I just didnt know what to do, plus I want to show her I am not cheap or easy, and I want to make sure I cant trust her, before I let her to close. Later that night, I saw her in bad shape, (too many drinks), and her girlfriend was helping her. I felt so awful, just seeing that, was very painful. Then I knew my feelings for her were very deep, serious and sincere.

Next time I met her, at the club (surprise) was about 3 weeks later. I saw her enter the club, and I went to her, to talk to her. When she walked past me, I reached out to greet her, but she responded angrily, and slapped my hand away. I didnt look at her just pulled my hand quickly back and went to my seat. I was completely devestated.

Next evening, I managed to find her phone number and contacted her. I told her that if I have done anything that hurt her or make her angry then I was really sorry, and asked her to forgive me. Then she did something strange. She said that she didnt remember anything from last night and that she didnt recognize me. But she sounded very happy, on the phone, a little tense too. But she asked me how I looked like, and where I did work. Somehow I find that hard to believe, because why would she sound so happy talking to a total stranger, asking him what he did for a living. Anyway, she was really nice on the phone, and even I felt nervous, it was comfortable talking to her. And she forgave me, even though she said she didnt remember anything. (she didnt look very drunk to me the night before. )

Next weekend I saw her at the club, and approached her, and told her it was I who talked to her on the phone last night. We shook hands, and the she started laughing, except the laughter sounded strange, whether she was nervous or was trying to humiliate me, I am not sure. I just laughed with her, and asked why she was laughing, (this laughter somehow sounded fake to me. ). She kept laughing, and I just took her hands in my palms, gave her a smile, then walked away.

Later that night I saw her with a guy, dancing. I met other girl I know a little and danced with her. I noticed while she was dancing with the other guy, she kept glancing at me and the other girl. When the club closed, I said goodbye to that girl I was dancing with, and went to get a taxi alone. I saw the girl I really liked and the guy there tooThey didnt seem so close at all. I got a taxi before them, so I don't know what happended between them.

Next weekend I saw her with her girlfriend, (which I know a little, we were in the same class in highschool), at the club. They were just dancing together, or sitting. When I was leaving the club, I walked past their table, I gave my old class mate a tap on the shoulder, and glanced sideways at the other girl (the one I like. ). She was looking at me, smiling. I didnt do anything, just left. Oh and by the way, (I told her on phone, that her friend and I were in the same class together. ).

I hope I did not bore you to death with this story, but I wanted to include every detail, so you would find it easier to give me a good advice. Also: What do you think about her, me and is there still a chance for me? Why did she dye her hair and then she had changed it back, next time I saw her. Why did she say she didnt recognize me on the phone, and said she didnt remember anyting? Was it to talk to me and get to know more about me? Or is it just a wishful thinking on my behalf. Why did she pick up some guy she obviously didnt care much about? Was it to test me, or my feelings towards her, some kind of a game, or she confused or just mean when under influence of alcohol.

I hope to hear from you soon. . . I am very serious about her, but is she? Kindest regards. C. F.