You're Thinking that Keeping Yourself in the Mix Will Improve Your Chances of Getting Him Back

You are putting this man and your efforts to win him back ahead of taking care of yourself. Many women have been socialized to believe that they are nothing without a man. In fact, you are nothing if you believe that you need a man to make you complete. Your new mantra needs to be: I come first and I do not allow anyone or anything to places me in a position that damages my self esteem or self respect.

If you ask yourself what is good for you and what isn't , you will have your answer: seeing him and sleeping with him while he plays the field is damaging to you. You aren't supposed to damage yourself under any circumstances. You need to also know that this man will never respect you if you don't respect yourself first. What's more, keeping yourself in the mix, as you call it, actually keeps him from having to poop or get off the pot. So long as he can have the milk for free, he doesn't need to buy the cow. You are available to the point of humiliating yourself. I

f you want this man back, you need to be a precious commodity that he needs to fight for. He needs to feel off balance and threatened with the knowledge that you are out there dating to find someone who treats you better than he does. Two can play this game and the minute that he feels that he might lose you to someone else, he will suddenly find you far more attractive.

Keep in mind that even after you 'win' him back, you are still going to have to contend with his basic problem--fear of commitment. This is the problem that made him take off in search of a better partner. Sooner or later the ball is going to back in your court. If he comes back to you, but starts withdrawing again, you are going to need to once again reiterate your mantra.

If you feel the need to hang on to someone who doesn't treat you right, read my Advice Archives to understand what unfinished childhood business may be keeping you stuck on a guy who doesn't reciprocate your love.